Tag: don’t give up

The Odds Are On Your Side

It’s one of the great ironies of my work over the years. A persistent reason people give for not thinking positively is they don’t want to be deluded by false hope. It’s ironic because they don’t see how often they’ve been deluded by their own negative thinking.

Often, when confronted by this fact, they will say they’re not being negative. They’re just being “realistic.”

This reveals a mass human tendency to see being negative about ourselves/our prospects as being realistic. It’s a simple psychological defense mechanism to seeks avert disappointment and often responsibility for outcomes we don’t want. If we “don’t get our hopes up,” we tell ourselves, “we won’t get hurt.”

What if we understood deeply that positive outcomes, even by pure chance, are as likely as negative outcomes? When we apply the power of our minds and our efforts, the scale quickly turns in favor of a positive outcome. We literally have direct control over making positive outcomes more likely in our lives.

Now, let’s reconsider the calculation. Is avoiding occasional setback and disappointment really worth missing a dozen victories we might have won, if only we hadn’t been too “realistic” to try? I will leave you to answer that question for yourself.

Keep your mind on your side.
Ray

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What If I’m Just Not Good Enough? – Day 123 of 365 Days to a Better You

Do you measure up? Can you really achieve this crazy dream you’re working on? Such thoughts terrorize every dreamer, at least the honest ones. No one escapes the inner voice that painstakingly dismantles you and your little dream for the fraud it is.

“Who are you?” “What makes you think you can be the next great…?”

Your heroes have done you a great disservice. They didn’t do it purposely and they didn’t do it to hurt you. They emerged into your world as these amazingly talented and successful people. That’s probably what made you aspire to be like them.

The part you missed was the years of hard work and devastating failure they went through to get where they are today. From your perspective, they’re like an iceberg. You see only the shimmering white part towering above the water. You don’t see the much larger submerged side hiding their challenges.

LeBron James was not LeBron James the first time he picked up a basketball. He had the potential to become the player you know, but you didn’t see the hours and years that went into becoming the planet’s best basketball player.

Steve Jobs was a super-smart tech geek. There are a lot of super-smart tech geeks. Some were way smarter than Jobs. Why was it him that transformed our technological landscape? Jobs spent his life working toward and honing a big vision. We all know the story of what Apple became, largely because of him. Yet, we don’t see the crazy focus and determination. We forget that he was fired, at one point, by the company he founded. Talk about a devastating setback. Many people would have folded up the tent and gone home.

The true “overnight success” is a remote rarity. “The only place where success comes before work,” multiple teachers have pointed out, “is in the dictionary.”

You need to stop comparing yourself to your heroes. It’s not a fair fight. Rachel Hollis counsels her audience, “Stop comparing your beginning with my middle.”

Your heroes are a dicey proposition. They can inspire you and deflate you all at the same time. You must remember they had the road to their mountaintop the same as you’re walking now. They had heroes they aspired to be or exceed. They had moments of doubt when throwing in the towel would have made total sense. Aren’t you glad they didn’t?

The way to reach yours is not to let your hero’s greatness paralyze you. Rather it’s to keep on walking your path so that some day someone else will see you as you see them. Then the world will be glad you didn’t quit.

Your greatness is NOT a myth!

Ray

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