You often hear people say, “Don’t let it steal your happiness/joy.”
They’re often referring to some trivial, in their eyes, circumstance that you’re allowing to bring down your mood and ruin your day.
There’s a chance they’re right. You’re overreacting and should release it and reclaim your happiness. They might also be wrong. You get decide what upsets you and what doesn’t.
The trouble is you’re not always sure you should be upset. Sometimes you don’t even want to be, but you are.
Here’s a simple mental exercise you can do to determine if it’s worth the emotional investment it takes to be upset and upend your happiness.
Visualize a scale like the one shown above. on one side of the scale, see the word happiness or joy, if you prefer. On the other side, see the circumstances that have you upset. Focus for a moment. See your scale clearly.
Now, ask yourself one simple question. Which is more important to me right now – my happiness/joy or allowing myself to be angry and upset?
Answer the question honestly. Then recognize that it is 100 percent your choice which to choose.
Make no mistake. Happiness is a choice. Remaining upset or angry is a choice. Neither option is forced upon you. You maintain compete autonomy to decide which will rule your mind right now and this day, week, year, or lifetime.
Sometimes a little anger can be short-term fuel for positive change, but it’s not a fuel to run a life by. It’s too toxic and corrosive.
Happiness and joy are ever-present, right here whenever you need them. You haven’t been cheated. They’re as accessible to you right now as they are to any other person on the planet. They are accessed by a choice and a quiet determination not to succumb to the negative.
You do you, but do the you that bear serves you,
Wherever you are on your journey, know I believe in you!
Make the radical choice to be happy no matter what.
Happiness is right here right now always, if we choose it. I promise! You can overcome your situational happiness and trade it for persistent happiness.
You and I place too many terms and conditions on our happiness. We say:
I’ll be happy if…
I’ll be happy when…
Yet we achieve those conditions and they may bring momentary happiness. Then we’re right back into dissatisfaction.
It’s not surprising. Our mainstream culture is a skilled merchant in unhappiness, fear, and dystopia. They sell it in bulk on the regular. We are easily swept into these eddies of dissatisfaction. If we’re not careful, they become our home.
I’m preaching at me as much as you this morning. I do it too. I place small print terms and conditions on my happiness. I waste days waiting and working for my conditions to materialize.
Buddha said, “The worst things in the world are desiring something and getting it.” I believe he was talking about this very cycle. We’re stuck in desiring rather than enjoying life. Then we get what we want and it loses its charms and appeal.
It IS a radical choice to be happy no matter what in such an environment. So, how do we achieve it?
Choose happiness over and over moment after moment. There’s no shortcut. Every moment presents us with a choice to be happy or be stuck in wanting and waiting.
Be here now. This was the famous advice of Ram Dass. Most of our unhappiness, if you pay attention, exists in the past and the projected future. This moment is wonderful, if you choose to see it.
Spend more time with roses and jasmine. This was the solution proposed by Rumi to his poetic question, “When you go to a garden do you look at thorns or flowers?” See the positive around you now.
Be still and know. God or the universe, however you term it, has your back. Good things are coming. Be happy about them before they even arrive.
Drop your terms and conditions and just be happy.
You are all awesome! Thanks for reading today’s post.
Lord knows you have enough stressful obligations each day. You have meetings at work you must attend even though you have, well, actual work to do. You break yourself to be there to support others by attending their events. It’s not a bad thing and you want to do it, but you often have to bend your schedule into pretzels to make it happen. There’s that dentist appointment that’s coming up. Then your car’s alternator decides now is the moment to go out.
The point is you have planned and unplanned events on your calendar that push your buttons, create stress, and make things a little darn harder then they need to be. To some extent, this is life. Yet, you need to find ways to mitigate the stressful and bring more of the good into your day.
I heard a simple and fantastic strategy from Brendon Buchard. Every morning, every morning before 9 a.m. schedule some joy into your day. Plan to do something for you; something that truly brings you joy. Write it into your calendar for a firm time that day and when that t8me comes, stop what you’re whatever else you’re doing and do that thing that adds joy to your day.
By having it on the calendar early in the day, you commit yourself to it and the expectation adds to the positive experience.
I thought this was a fantastic idea and I’m adding it to my daily routine immediately. I hope you will too.
Just in case no one has reminded you today, you ARE awesome!