You Might Have to Be Gullible to Be Great – Day 333 of 365 Days to a Better You

There are times, when you’re seeking to achieve great things, that you must suspend disbelief. You must go out on a limb, on a whim, and follow the dream wherever it takes you.

Many people simply lack the fortitude to be that vulnerable. They’re petrified of being seen as gullible. So, they swallow their dreams and push back against their potential and their possibility. They abandon hope for a better life or a better world all to satisfy their “play-it-safe” mentality.

They’ve given up dreaming because dreaming risks disappointment, the embarrassment of failure, or exposing them as a gullible dreamer unaware of the many perils involved in trying to improve things.

So, people play their normative games, maintain their normative mindsets, and make their normative excuses to justify keeping themselves and the world just as it is.

That’s not me. It’s never been me. I hope it’s not you either. The world needs a few more people willing to be gullible enough to believe that things don’t have to stay as they are just to keep small thinkers happy.

Ordinary thinking will not lead to your greatest self. Greatness comes to those gullible enough to believe better is possible.

Just in case no one else reminded you today, you’re awesome!

Ray

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Conquering the “What Ifs” – Day 327 of 365 Days to a Better You

“What if” can be a very powerful mindset when it comes to creativity or looking to the future. However, the same mindset directed at the past can be highly destructive and paralyzing.

“What if I’d done this or said that?” “what if I’d avoided this or encouraged that?”

These questions, beyond the benefit of learning for next time, are rabbit holes keeping you stuck in scenarios that you can’t change. They waste time and mind space that are better spent dealing with now and manifesting the future.

Here are a few ways to shake the chronic “what ifs.”

  1. Shift from what if to what is and what can be.
  2. Understand that nothing is lost. The what ifs often show up when we think we’ve missed something or lost something. It’s a powerful spiritual principle to understand that everything changes in our multiverse, but nothing is ever lost.
  3. Believe something better is up ahead. Whatever you believe you missed or lost back there, know that something even better lies ahead, if you’ll only keep working.
  4. See the futility. Go down the what if road a few more times. Be conscious of how you feel and how unproductive it is. Get clear that there’s nothing there for you in persisting with that mindset.

Finally, don’t beat yourself up. We all do “what if” sometimes. The only way to make it worse is to pile on by being mad for going there. Accept that it happens and consciously move away from it as soon as you can.

Just in case no one else has reminded you today, you’re awesome!

Ray

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Ask Bigger, Better Questions – Day 324 of 365 Days to a Better You

You may remember earlier in our journey we discussed how there are no dumb questions. Today I want to expand on that and encourage you to ask bigger and better questions.

If we want bigger answers in our lives, for our species, and for the planet, we must ask BIGGER questions. If we want better answers, we must ask better questions.

Lives and civilizations thrive or fail based on the size and the quality of the questions they ask. If you want to profoundly shift your life, you’ve got to be willing to put everything on the table in your evaluation of it. The questions you asked or never asked, that created your current life are not big enough or smart enough to create the next better version of you,

“OK. Makes sense,” you might say, “but how do I ask bigger, better questions?”

  1. Go deeper – to ask the questions that really matter and can really change things, you have to understand who you are and what you want at a fundamental level.
  2. Be authentic- once you understand who you are and what you want, be authentic. Don’t run away from it no matter how scary or paradigm-shattering it may seem.
  3. Getting from here to there – just like you look at a map before getting in your car to drive someplace new, you have to map what getting from who you are to who you want to be looks like.
  4. Formulate your questions – who or what do you need to challenge or change? What ideas and paradigms have to shift? Ask more WHY and WHAT IF questions. These questions get to what matters and challenge paradigms.

By doing this, you’ll find that the questions you ask as you move through life each day will shift from:

  • What do I want to eat?
  • What do I want to watch on TV?
  • Where do I want to go on vacation this year?
  • What do people think of me?

To:

  • Does this job still fulfill me? If not, what career would serve me better at this point in my life?
  • Why do I want to be a screenwriter and how can I make that happen?
  • What would my life look like if I chose to be authentically me instead who I was pushed to be?
  • What if money and time were not an object? Who would I be then?
  • Why am I just getting by instead of living my dreams?
  • How can I make the biggest difference?
  • How could we have a next-level relationship?
  • What if war isn’t inevitable and peace impossible?

The bigger and better your questions, the bigger and better the universe’s answers. Unasked questions rarely receive answers. The very act of asking opens doors, gets your mind working on the how, and inspires your why to make it happen.

Just in case no one else reminds you today, you are AWESOME!

Ray

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Remodeling Inner You – Day 320 of 365 Days to a Better You

In the infinity of time and space, the coming of another orbit of the earth around our Star is barely noticeable. Yet, for human beings these passages are deeply meaningful. They help us separate our lives into meaningful chunks.

The coming of a new year is a time we all reflect, set new goals, and make promises about the person we’re goi g to be during the next 365 days.

What promises, goals, and resolutions have you written down or made mental note of today and how will you track your progress? Here’s an easy measure applicable to anyone participating in social media. Remodel your inner self to be the person you project yourself to be on social media.

  1. Care as much about other people as you do on social media.
  2. Care as much about the earth as you do on social media.
  3. Spread humor and laugh heartily as you do on social media.
  4. Be your best self each day like you are on social media.
  5. Work for the changes you want to see in the world as much as you post about them on social media.
  6. Live the good life you project on social media.
  7. Be as good of a entrepreneur as you portray yourself as on social media.
  8. Live up to your spiritual values to an extent that matches what you say on social media.
  9. Care about political reform as passionately as you speak of it on social media.

For those who use these platforms, you’ve already created this idyllic version of your life that you’re supposedly living. To get better in 2020, simply start aligning your reality with that projection. It’s not fake if you make it real.

Just in case no one else has reminded you today, you’re awesome!

Ray

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Thoughts on Dealing with Mistakes – Day 310 of 365 Days to a Better You

A mistake; perhaps you’ve made one or two in your time. I know I have. The question isn’t whether you’ll make another mistake. The question is how will you deal with your mistake, pick yourself up and move on.

Here are some #Rayquotes, affirmations, and famous quotes about dealing with mistakes. I hope you find them useful.

RayQuotes

  1. Life’s first great lesson is that you’re human and you make mistakes. Life’s second great lesson is you’re amazing anyway.
  2. The energy you use beating yourself up for a mistake is better used working to get better.
  3. If you make a mistake, own it, apologize and make it right.
  4. Release your belief that making mistakes is a bad thing. Making mistakes is the only way to grow.
  5. The only unforgivable mistake is to let a mistake stop you. We all make them. Keep going!

Affirmations

  1. I give myself credit for my successes. I forgive myself for my mistakes. I know that all leads to growth and healing.
  2. I own up to all of my mistakes from the past and forgive myself.
  3. I acknowledge my mistakes, I get better, and I move forward.
  4. I am human and I make mistakes. I am also amazing and I learn from my mistakes!
  5. Today I bless my mistakes for lighting the path to a better me!
  6. Winners power up on a future full of possibility. Losers power down on a past full of mistakes.
  7. I learn from my mistakes without belittling myself for them.

Famous Quotes

  1. A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new. ~ Albert Einstein
  2. I prefer you to make mistakes in kindness than work miracles in unkindness. ~ Mother Teresa
  3. Most of my advances were by mistake. You uncover what is when you get rid of what isn’t. ~ Buckminster Fuller
  4. Mistakes are the portals of discovery. ~ James Joyce
  5. The price of inaction is far greater than the cost of making a mistake. ~ Meister Eckhart
  6. Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them. ~Bruce Lee
  7. Analyze your mistakes. You’ve already paid the tuition, you might as well get the lesson. ~Tim Fargo
  8. Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself. ~Groucho Marx
  9. Mistakes are the usual bridge between inexperience and wisdom. ~Phyllis Therous
  10. Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better. ~Maya Angelou

The bottom line is mistakes are opportunities. They’re either opportunities to grow, change, and advance or they’re opportunities to wallow, stagnate, or quit. The choice is yours.

In case no one else has reminded you today, you’re awesome!

Ray

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Eat Your Dessert First – Day 309 of 365 Days to a Better You

You should always listen to your grandmother. Mine once told me you should always eat dessert first…just in case.

Today we buried my father-in-law. He was a good man who, despite his many challenges, always brought a smile to other peoples’ faces. As I said my final goodbyes to him, my grandmother’s words came back to me. In fact, they took on a new and more profound meaning.

Sure, there’s the plain meaning of eat the chocolate cake before the meal. Who can argue with the wisdom of that?

What, though, if dessert is a metaphor for all the good and important things in life? What if eating your dessert first means spending the time now with the people you love? What if it means to stop putting off your most important goals and dreams? What if means to stop denying yourself meaningful experiences because you don’t have time or they cost too much? EAT YOUR DESSERT FIRST!

One day each of us will lay in that box with our friends and loved ones looking over us to say their goodbyes. Will your belly be full of all life’s mundane necessities or will your face be smeared with the chocolate frosting of a life well-lived? You’re making that decision now with every choice you make.

Hey, just in case no one else has reminded you today, you are awesome!

Have a great evening, my friends.

Ray

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When Nobody’s Watching – Day 299 of 365 Days to a Better You

Virtually every human being has two versions. Yes, I mean you and I mean me. There’s the public you and there’s the private you.

The public you, unless you’ve attained sainthood or enlightenment, tries to impress, to fit in, and to stand out. It tends to pretend you’ve got it all figured out and you’re damn near flawless. It’s the “Facebook self” you present to the world.

Don’t misunderstand me you’re every bit the one in a trillion miracle we’ve talked about previously. It’s just that you and I are still works in progress.

Then there’s the other you…the person you are when nobody’s watching. This is the person your public side tries desperately to hide. This person has imperfect thoughts and sometimes does imperfect things. It’s the person you’d be embarrassed to show the world…the person you wish you weren’t.

Take heart! You’re not alone! This is an ubiquitous human experience. Practically every person you meet is struggling with this same dichotomy.

Consider this. Don’t feel ashamed of that private self or beat yourself up over it. It’s an amazing blessing in disguise. It’s a great barometer for measuring who you honestly are compared to who you fervently aspire to be. That self makes it real in a way your Facebook self would never tolerate. Without such truth-telling, how can you ever hope to be your best self?

It’s the great work of your life to bring that real you into ever better alignment with your aspirational you.

Here are five easy (not simple) steps you can take to make it so.

  1. Take honest stock. Where are you really?
  2. Where do you want to be? Get as clear a vision as possible of who you want your private self to be.
  3. How will you bridge the gap between the two? What do you need to start doing? What do you need to stop doing? What do you need to do more of?
  4. See yourself and speak yourself and act yourself into a better you each day.
  5. Absolutely unquestionably know that you have an enlightened being living within you and ready to emerge if you’re willing to do the work.

I love each and every one of your private selves. If no one else has reminded you today, you are AWESOME!

Ray

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