Doubts and Dreams Quote

This #RayQuote is a reminder that we can spend our time believing in our dreams or in our doubts. It takes the same energy either way. We all know which will yield better results.

Wherever you are on your journey today, know that you’re a miracle in the making.

Ray

Tug of War for Your Dreams – Day 257 of 365 Days to a Better You

Do you remember when you were a kid picking teams for a game in gym class? Imagine the game is tug of war. You’ve been selected as one of the captains. It’s 10 kids to a team, but you have 30 kids in your class. The other captain and you each pick your team of 10 and 10 kids are left out.

You line, grab the rope, and begin pulling. After a few seconds, the gym teacher tells two of the kids sitting out to join the other team. With the added help, they begin to pull your team toward defeat, but your team is tough and you manage to regain your footing and hold your ground.

The gym teacher tells two more kids to join the other team. Now, the other team is pulling you more rapidly toward defeat. Finally, the gym teacher has the rest of the kids join the other team. Your team collapses immediately and is dragged helplessly to defeat.

You jump up and scream, “That wasn’t fair!” You would, right? I mean 20 versus 10 is going to end only one way. If you’re the 10, it’s not good for you.

Now I want you to think about your life and your dreams. You are the captain of two tug of war teams – Team Dream and Team Doubt. These teams aren’t made of people. They’re comprised of your thoughts and feelings. They’re locked in an eternal struggle for the outcome of your dreams.

You begin the match with belief, confidence, action, determination, and vision on Team Dream. You start pulling and you’re starting to win, but it’s not happening as fast as you imagined. You start to feel the doubt creeping in and add a couple of new members to Team Doubt – “What if I’m not good enough?” “This is how things always go for me.”

You start to lose ground and you add a couple more members to Team Doubt. “Why can’t I win just this once?” “This isn’t fair.”

This process continues until your doubts drag your dream mercilessly through the mud. You’d like to jump up and scream, “That wasn’t fair,” but you did it to yourself.

This metaphor is a process the teacher Abraham Hicks calls Contrast. You have your thoughts, feelings, and actions aligned for success, but they’re met by an equal or superior force of countering thoughts, feelings, and actions pulling the other way. You wind up failing or at best in a stalemate.

Powerhack: Logic tells you there’s two ways to change the situation. You either have to provide more force behind your positive thoughts and feelings…which is not very efficient considering you probably were already pushing as much as you could. It’s more effective to clear the doubts and negative thoughts and feelings.

Some of the biggest doubts are what I’d term the journalist questions – who, what, where, when, and why, and how. It’s normal to wonder these things, but because you don’t have ready answers they all produce doubt.

You know you want to be a rock star, but you don’t have an answer to all the journalist questions. How do you proceed? STAY GENERAL and AVOID SPECIFICS. I know this sounds counterintuitive to your western-trained mind. Specifics become blockers and doubts. You get caught up in who, what, where, when, why, and how and you lose sight of and energy toward the goal.

Instead, simply hold the vision of the goal, line up the empowering thoughts, feelings, and actions and let God or the Universe handle the details. As you move along with this positive force toward your goal, the people, places, and situations you need will appear. Trust and allow. You don’t have to release every last bit of doubt. That wouldn’t be human. You simply need to give your positive energy the advantage in the tug of war.

As you release the energy of doubt and resistance, it’s like dropping weights from a hot air balloon, you’ll begin to rise. The more resistance you drop, the faster you’ll ascend.

When it comes to the tug of war for your dreams, simply stop putting members on Team Doubt.

Thank you all for reading and for the amazing support you’ve shown this blog this year. I’m grateful that you spend valuable time from your day here.

Ray

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10 Practical Ways to Defeat Your Doubts – Day 21 of 365 Days to a Better You

Defeat your doubts

No less than Jesus and Buddha specifically called out doubt as a hinderance to your spiritual path and your physical life.

Doubt is a thief. It comes in your weakest moments and steals dreams, motivation, and hope. To be a better version of you, doubt has to be addressed. But, how?

Doubt is part of the human condition. It will never go away. Like most of your other challenges, it has its beneficial and destructive side. Doubt becomes destructive when it keeps you stuck: afraid to act on your dreams.

Here are some power life hacks for handling your doubts and turning them into productive partners in your journey.

  1. Live in the mystery – let’s get right to it. Doubt is really a fear of the unknown. You’re not really afraid to show up as a powerful you, grow your business, or apply to Harvard. You’re really afraid of the unknown. Humans have a tendency to fill in the unknown with fearful things.
    • Power hack: Set aside those fearful unknowns. Be willing to live with the uncertainty. Sometimes people call this operating outside your comfort zone. If you can get comfortable living there, you’ll find the uncertainty is filled with unlimited power, possibility, and potential.
  2. Doubt your doubts – why should your doubts be given more credence than your belief? They’re not right or wrong any more or any less than other thoughts. The fact you choose to believe them, exposes a negative mindset.
    • Power hack: Cross-examine your doubts. Make them prove their case. Give your belief and your courage equal time to make their case. Make informed decisions. Let all ties go to your belief!
  3. Suspend your doubts – you don’t have believe huge miraculous things right now, although you’re free to do so. Just suspend your doubts long enough to try.
    • Power hack: Put your doubts in “time out.” Say an affirmation like, “Just for today, I suspend my doubts and trust my dreams.” If you need to back it off one more step, “Just for this moment, I suspend my doubts and trust my dreams.”
  4. Get a stronger Why – some times doubts creep in solely because you don’t have strong enough why to overcome them. Get a stronger why! What’s your why statement? Are you fired up enough about it to ignore your doubts and take action?
    • Power hack: Think about the most important reason you’re pursuing your goals and dreams. Build a Personal Why Statement that clearly articulates why you must take action – massive action as Tony Robbins often says – today.
  5. External critics – not all your doubts come from within you. Some are spawned by the people around you or the culture as a whole. This is often called “conventional wisdom.”
    • Power hack: Listen to sound advice whatever its source. Ignore bad advice whatever its source. The fact that someone loves you is not a good enough reason to let their criticism stop you. As for conventional wisdom? There’s no wisdom in it. It’s never, ever in all of history achieved anything new. It’s the combined wisdom of what is. Not what can be. Which are you building?
  6. Past successes – remember your past successes. Remember all the doubts you had before you achieved that success? They didn’t stop you. Why should they now?
    • Power hack: Make a list of past successes where you doubted the outcome. Keep the list with you and refer to it when your doubts are trying to stop you from trying something new.
  7. You’re not alone – it’s easy for an entrepreneur, an activist, or anyone challenging the status quo to feel like you’re only the one. Trust me. You’re not. There’s tons of other people facing the same challenges.
    • Power hack: Find others facing similar challenges and doubts. Brainstorm ways to overcome them. Be there for each other and keep each other accountable.
  8. Forgive and let go – some of your doubts spring from the scars of past failure or setback. It’s time to let them go. Just because you fell of the bike doesn’t mean you don’t get back on.
    • Power hack: The Japanese have a saying, “Fall down seven times, get up eight.” Be resilient, be forgiving of yourself, let go of your past failures and focus on your future successes.
  9. Get help – if your doubts really have you stuck, talk to someone. It could be a friend, a family member, or maybe a counselor, if the challenges are significant enough.
    • Power hack: Talk to your biggest fan. It might be your mother, your best friend, a colleague at work, or a past or present client. When you’re feeling doubt, you need a cheerleader – someone to remind you just how damn good you are!
  10. Pump yourself up – you often feel doubt when you’re feeling down. Get yourself pumped and reconnected to the bigger whole. Pray, meditate, use affirmations, give yourself a pep talk. Listen to an inspiring TED Talk or music that really gets you going. When you’re feeling stronger, your doubts will lessen.
    • Power hack: Use college fight songs. Yours may have the most emotionally powerful connection for you, but these are pieces of music written to pump people up. Here’s a great list of some of the best to get you started. Listen to them for about 10-15 minutes. I guarantee you, you’re mood will change.

I’ll leave you with this. There’s not many ascended masters walking around. Every single human being experiences doubt. The difference in success and happiness is what you do with your doubt.

I believe you! Meet me halfway and believe in you too!

Ray

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