We all do it. We assume the worst about people and situations. Often this causes us to imagine negative things that never materialize, but that doesn’t stop us from living in those spaces for days, weeks, months, years.
This is especially true when you interpret other peoples’ motives in the worst possible light. This is sometimes a response to negative life experiences or bad past experiences with certain people. Still, this tendency to expect the worst from others is a major cause of negativity in our lives.
Look, if an individual has let you down so many times, you should consider cutting that person out of your life. It’s not a productive or effective strategy to constantly have your guard up, assuming everyone is taking advantage of you.
Power hack: Do your best to come into each situation with fresh eyes and a pure heart. Adjust to the particulars of that situation and that person in this new situation rather than going in with shields up expecting the worst.
I know this is a real shift for some of you. Life has scarred you. But, I’d argue, so has this mindset. You’ll soon see that other people have great motives and intentions you were missing before. Plus, by approaching life more openly, you may just encourage others to do the same. That just might benefit your whole support system.
Stay awesome…a.k.a. just do you.
Ray
This is so relatable! I was in the same boat when I was young. I was bullied and abused for six years in school and, for a while, I lost my trust in humanity and thought everyone had ulterior motives. I closed myself off to people because I thought all people were evil and I wanted to play it safe. However, I missed out on what would’ve been wonderful and fulfilling relationships. I didn’t change my way of thinking until I was in my thirties and I have to tell you, I was amazed at the positive life change. I’m now an happy, confident, and fulfilled person and I’m grateful for that. Thank you for posting.
Cherie, thank you for reading and for sharing your story. I’m so glad you were able to get back to a place where you trusted people. Our lives don’t come with guidebooks. Sometimes all we have to go on is the experiences we’ve had. I love the Maya Angelou quote, “Do the best you can until you know better.”
You’re so welcome, Ray. And thank you for your kind words. 🙂