Rules for Being Human – Day 291 of 365 Days to a Better You

Cherie Carter-Scott PhD is a best-selling author and globally recognized expert on human and organizational development. Yet, her best known content, has circled the globe for decades largely anonymously.

The spark was lit when her Rules for Being Human (aka The 10 Rules for Being Human) appeared in Jack Canfield’s 1993 mega best-seller Chicken Soup for the Soul. Canfield was only later made aware of her authorship of the rules. Carter-Scott had developed the now-famous rules in the mid 1970s. The rules later appeared in her own 1998 book If Life is a Game, These are the Rules.

If these rules are new to you, they are a profound roadmap to personal development. If you’ve seen these years ago, now may be a great time revisit them. Here are the rules along with brief explanations commonly accompanying them

  1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it but it will be yours for the entire period this time around. You have chosen its shape on a deeper level; you can change it.
  2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called life on planet Earth. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons.You may like the lessons, or think them irrelevant.
  3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of experimentation — trial and error. The so-called failed experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately “works.”
  4. A lesson is repeated until learned. It will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you’ve learned it, you can then go on to the next lessons. If you don’t learn easy lessons, they become harder. You will know you’ve learned a lesson when your actions change.
  5. Learning lessons does not end. There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. Every person, every incident is the universal teacher. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.
  6. “There” is no better than “here.” Nothing leads to happiness. When your “there” has become a “here” you will simply obtain another “there” that again looks better than “here.”
  7. Others are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate in yourself.
  8. What you create of your life is up to you. Life is like a movie; you may feel like a bit player, but you have the power to become a screen writer, casting director, producer, director. It’s your movie. You have all the tools and resources you need; what you do with them is up to you. There are three kinds of people: those who make things happen, those who watch what happens, and those who wonder what happened. Notice that you do have the courage; take charge of your life. If you don’t, someone else will.
  9. Your answers lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust. Then you’ll realize that you are the spiritual being you’ve been seeking.
  10. You will tend to forget all this.

 Ray

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Poem: The Hug – The Affirmation Spot for Saturday February 13, 2010

“THE HUG”

By Ray Davis
Copyright 1997

Tender moments spent in her embrace
No Mozart concerto, no gentle April day,
whatever charms they may possess,
can make me feel alive that way.

Two souls profoundly engaged.
Two hearts feeling love’s gentle tug.
A rapturous intermingling,
while enjoying a simple hug.

Stay inspired!

Ray

2010 Affirmation

“2010 is MY year! This is the year I break free! This is the year I break through! This is the year I break out!”

Your Belief Inventory – The Affirmation Spot for Monday January 12, 2009

Today’s Affirmation:

“This year I am absolutely committed to being the person I came here to be.”
(This is the official TAS affirmation for 2009. Click the affirmation to hear the mp3 version)

yesterdayWhat you believe about you, your life, and the world impacts your experience of them. Your beliefs inform your thoughts and your thoughts generate your actions. And, of course, your actions create the world where you live. It’s very important to be aware of your beliefs.

Are your current beliefs fully conscious to you? Or, is your self-perception stuck in yesterday? Do you know what you believe today? Of course, the quick answer is “yes”. Do you really?

Just as a once- thriving river bed slowly dries up and changes course your beliefs can subtly shift over time almost without your knowledge. You don’t notice it day to day, but over years the change can be dramatic.

Life is an ever-changing adventure, but sometimes your self-perception and the perception of others does not keep up with who you are today.

You and the people around you may have an outdated idea of who you are.

Have you had the experience of really advancing in your professional or personal life only to have your family not recognize the change? You go home for the holidays and your mother still sees you and treats you like you’re 13. It can be very frustrating when others fail to recognize the strides and leaps you have made in life. Their perception of you can become locked in time.

When I was 25 I became seriously ill and spent several weeks in the hospital. One of the best internists in the city took my case. He became my personal physician for several years. He was a gifted and talented doctor, but he never let go of his vision of me as that sick person lying in a hospital bed. Finally, I had to move on and find a new doctor. His belief about who I was didn’t keep up with reality.

While frustrating when other people do this to you, you often do it to yourself. Has your perception of who you are kept up with the reality?

Here is an idea to help you get in touch with who you are today. Complete a Belief Inventory.

Take each of the following dimensions of your life (feel free to add your own) and write a brief description of your belief on that area of your life.

Don’t jump the gun. Give it some real thought. Really capture your true beliefs on each of these topics.

Belief Inventory

  • Personality
  • Relationships
  • Career
  • Body image
  • Future
  • Spiritual life
  • Life
  • Politics

Here’s the punchline. Now that you better understand where you really stand on these aspects of your life you can map a strategy for self-development based on where you really are instead of where you thought you were.

If you’re really bold, share it with family and friends and have them complete one on you. The feedback could be interesting and you will get a sense of who they think you are.

Have fun with your Belief Inventory and I’d love to hear how it comes out.

Stay inspired!

Ray

Ray Davis is the author of Anunnaki Awakening: Revelation – order your signed copy today at AATrilogy.com – founder of The Affirmation Spot and an advocate for the potential of the human race. He’s life-long history buff and holds a B.S. in History Education. He’s always been fascinated by alternative views of history.

anunnaki_cover_full_colorAnunnaki Awakening: Revelation is turning heads and opening minds. Humanity’s past is checkered, secret, and dangerous.

White House Correspondent Maria Love is on to the story of her life and with the help of an Anunnaki leaders seeks to unravel and reveal history’s biggest conspiracy. The Awakening has begun!

It’s in the Eyes – The Affirmation Spot for Friday October 17, 2008

 Today’s affirmation is:

“I believe wholeheartedly that I am part of the solution in my life and in my world.” (click to hear it now)

Most of us would like to make a difference in our time here on the planet. There so many small ways you can make the world a better place each day. One way is to consciously make eye contact with people throughout your day. They say the eyes are the windows to the soul.

I’m not sure why, but our culture seems to have developed an aversion to looking people in the eye. If you’ve noticed, even in the presidential debates you don’t see the candidates looking at each other. We talk around or at each other, but not really to each other. Eye contact, I believe, is a great way to counter that tendency.

Few means of human connection match eye contact. When you look someone in the eye it’s hard to miss his or her humanity.

Recently, I’ve made it a habit to practice looking people in the eye when I thank them. You can do it with the checkout clerk at the grocery store or when someone holds a door for you. There are many opportunities everyday.

My experience in this experiment is that when you make it a point to look people in the eye and combine it with “thank you”, you generally get a smile in return. It creates a brief, but significant moment of connection and allows both of you to remember you are sharing this world with other people.

When you can remember that – really remember it – even for just brief moments in your day it really helps to build the connection you feel with the people who interact with you every day.

Stay inspired!

Ray

101 Ways to Use Affirmations – The Affirmation Spot for Tuesday August 26, 2008

Today’s Affirmation:

“Whatever goal or dream I choose to pursue, I find success.”


Affirmations are such an underutilized tool in our society. Many people have mistakenly associated them with just a few areas of life – self-development, recovery, or sales. The fact is they are a simple and effective tool for improving nearly any area of your life where you want to improve or acheive.

Affirmations are the thought part of the equation. They must be supported by action. Remember, a mind practicing empowered thinking is much more apt to take the actions that make dreams so.

Here are 101 ways to use affirmations to get you started.

  1. Empower your thinking
  2. Empower action in your life
  3. Improve your golf swing
  4. Develop your confidence
  5. Advance your career
  6. Exceed your quota
  7. Experience more peace
  8. Win more games
  9. Become a better public speaker
  10. Become a better student
  11. Build your self-esteem
  12. Successfully battle addictions
  13. Live more happily
  14. Focus on your goals
  15. Achieve your goals
  16. Become a better musician
  17. Become a better shortstop
  18. Become a better gymnast
  19. Deepen your faith
  20. Stay motivated in the face of difficulty
  21. Improve  creativity
  22. Give yourself some credit
  23. Attract a better job
  24. Become a better quarterback
  25. Become a better dancer
  26. Become a better free throw shooter
  27. Enhance your trust in yourself
  28. Enhance your trust in the Universe
  29. Enhance your trust in God
  30. Achieve more
  31. Strengthen your commitment to your relationships
  32. Improve your tennis serve
  33. Commit to and achieve weight loss
  34. Commit to an exercise program
  35. Improve your cooking
  36. Become a faster swimmer
  37. Write your best
  38. Challenge yourself
  39. Gain inspiration for your painting
  40. Build a more successful business
  41. Increase your sales
  42. Help you appreciate life
  43. Develop new skills
  44. Become a better skier
  45. Become a hockey player
  46. Become a more successful author
  47. Help you pursue your dreams of a singing career
  48. Deal with stress
  49. Handle adversity
  50. Become a better engineer
  51. Connect to your audience
  52. Pursue your acting dreams
  53. Be the best coach
  54. Start over
  55. Try something new
  56. Experience more love
  57. Feel more joy
  58. Find encouragement
  59. Encourage growth
  60. Become a better engineer
  61. Take charge of your dreams
  62. Become a better pitcher
  63. Improve your putting
  64. Envision a better life
  65. Stay organized
  66. Get more done
  67. Become a better preacher
  68. Write your great novel
  69. Paint your great painting
  70. Develop a sense of purpose
  71. Develop more wisdom
  72. Become a better volleyball player
  73. Become a better architect
  74. Age gracefully
  75. Enjoy life
  76. Become a better poet
  77. Assume leadership confidently
  78. Be your best
  79. Change direction in life
  80. Calm down
  81. Become a better lawyer
  82. See the beauty in life
  83. Become a better teacher
  84. Appreciate nature
  85. Remind you that you have choices
  86. Get control of your finances
  87. Become a better salesperson
  88. Make more time for you
  89. Succeed more often
  90. Become a stronger person
  91. Become a better manager
  92. Inspire others
  93. Make a difference
  94. Become a better right fielder
  95. Improve your gardening
  96. Make time for leisure
  97. Achieve relaxation
  98. Become a better police officer
  99. Attract business opportunities
  100. Make peace with money
  101. Fine-tune practically any skill

 

Stay inspired!

Ray

Interview with Maia Berens – The Affirmation Spot for Friday June 20, 2008



ray_launchpad.jpgYour Fifth Affirmation is Always Free at The Affirmation Spot

Whenever you download four affirmations at The Affirmation Spot your fifth affirmation is free. Simply type five in the coupon field at checkout to get your fifth affirmation free. (Offer valid only on a per order basis. Multiple single downloads do not receive this discount.)


Today’s affirmation is:

“Right this moment I am attracting the perfect mate into my life.”
(5 times)

“Right this moment you are attracting the perfect mate into your life.”
(5 times)

Hear an audio mp3 version of this affirmation right now.



 

Today we are honored to have a The Affirmation Spot exclusive interview with Maia Berens.

 

 Maia Berens is a California-based life coach specializing in relationships. She has successfully coached countless clients by telephone over more than 10 years. She helps people to improve their lives and develop long-term successful relationships.

 

 Maia credits her own successful 23-year relationship and her 18 years collaboration with world-renowned relationship expert John Gray (Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus) for giving her the foundation to help others with their relationships.

 

 Maia says about herself, “I have a natural ability to help people see what’s good about what’s going on in their lives.” Her goal for her clients is simple – help them create the confidence within that leads to the ability to have a successful relationship.

  

The Affirmation Spot: Maia, thank you for the opportunity to speak with you. Can you begin my telling us a little about your background and what inspired you to become a relationship coach?

Maia Berens: That’s a pretty funny one to start with for me. I am just becoming very clear on my own personal path that I am really not a relationship coach, but rather someone who coaches clients to get ready for relationships by helping them re-discover/uncover their authentic selves. So what inspired me to become that – lets call it Real Self Coach? (It) was my natural bent to teach and coach and the miraculous changes that I’ve been blessed to have occur in my life using all the tools and attitude changes I teach/coach.

 

The Affirmation Spot: There seem to be three sides to your current work – coach, writer and blogger, and business person. How do you balance those three aspects of your life and keep your own relationships in balance and vibrant?

 Maia Berens: I know my priorities. They are self-care, work, family and friends in no particular order except self-care is the basis for it all. My husband and my family are definitely priorities, but I put them before me and my needs only if there is an emergency. I guess it boils down to knowing who and what’s important in the moment.

 

The Affirmation Spot: You worked with John Gray author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus for many years. What was it like to work with John and how did that collaboration influence what you are doing now?

Maia Berens: John is a very creative and brilliant guy. It was inspiring and a great learning experience working closely with him. His influences are vast in my life and that of my husband and my kids. He taught us and took us through many healing experiences in his workshops in the early ’80’s. He taught us tools to heal the past and have functional relationships. I got an opportunity to create workshops based on his material and coach 500 professional therapists and speakers to help them get out of their own way to create success in their workshop businesses. My husband and I actually met in a workshop conducted by John and Barbara De Angelis and John participated in marrying us 22 years ago. One of my daughters got to work in our Mars Venus Institute for 3 years and got to get experience being paid as a writer and she is now a screenwriter.

 

The Affirmation Spot: Are relationships more complicated today than they were 50 or 100 years ago? If so, what is driving that complexity and how do people handle deal with the complexity and succeed in their relationships?

Maia Berens: Relationships of the past were more based on financial need and functional need years ago, I believe. Today we expect partnership; we have super busy lives complicated with technology, traffic, everyone working, etc. And we are evolving to become more authentic (although probably not less complicated) humans. Your question about how do people deal – not so well in a lot of cases. We are still suffering from a lot of old ideas and (this) isn’t helped by our media. But the news is good. More and more people like you and I are having an impact and people are willing to learn.

 

The Affirmation Spot: You mention the role of the media in propagating some old ideas. What are some the biggest misconceptions that you see repeated or reinforced in the media?

Maia Berens: It’s probably mostly the happily ever after stories in the movies that never show real work and real resolution, more than anything.

 

The Affirmation Spot: What role, in your view, do our relationships play in our spiritual development?

Maia Berens: Relationships can be a “Way”. They can be a way to lay bare the ego and learn how to heal the past and in doing so lead one to become more and more authentic – who we really are – spirit having a human experience.

 

The Affirmation Spot: How would you describe your coaching philosophy?

Maia Berens: I believe that all the answers are in each of us. Our coaching collaboration allows me to hear where you may not be looking and (helps me) point out to you where you are not seeing yourself as fabulous as you really are. I reflect back to you and keep you on course in the direction you’ve told me you want to go. Unlike many coaches, I also act as a mentor in many areas. I gently tell you what I see and you may reject it or use it.

 

The Affirmation Spot: How does a person or a couple recognize the need for a coach? How does what you differ from traditional counseling?

Maia Berens: If you want support to get somewhere in your life and you aren’t getting there yourself, a coach is a great choice. If you feel you want to delve into the whys and wherefores of your past, probably a therapist is for you. Also a therapist is probably a good idea if you keep having highly abusive relationships.

 

The Affirmation Spot: What qualities and credentials should people be looking for in choosing a coach?

Maia Berens: You know you have a match if you feel like this person (the coach) gets you and has your agenda first. I suggest having sample sessions or conversations with as many coaches as it takes until you find that fit. Trust your gut and don’t be sold.

 

The Affirmation Spot: What are some of the biggest pitfalls you see people in long-term relationships falling into? What words of advice would you offer to people in “stale” relationships?

Maia Berens: (The) biggest pitfall is not saying what is going on for real and in good time – even if it’s to say I feel the relationship is stale and I’m not feeling loving. Hard truths are the most challenging to speak, but they are the only way to get back to love. I also think people don’t really know how to have really deep relationships. By that (I mean), I don’t think they know that it takes work and clearing of old emotional stuff and old beliefs formed in childhood in order to have a relationship that can works now.

 

The Affirmation Spot: What words of advice can you offer young people entering the world of serious relationships for the first time?

Maia Berens: Be brave enough to express what is really going on with you and trust what your intuition is telling you. Find an older, more successful person in good relationships to check things out with.

 

The Affirmation Spot: Maia, thank you for the fantastic insights. How can people contact you to learn more about your services?

Maia Berens:

 Phone:  (310) 264-5625

Email: maia@whataboutlifecoaching.com

Websites: http://whataboutlifecoaching.com and http://thepumpkincoach.com

 

Thank you to Maia for sharing her wisdom with us.

 

Stay inspired!

 

Ray

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Self-Confidence Manifesto – The Affirmation Spot for Thursday November 29, 2007

Welcome to The Affirmation Spot. If this is your first time to the site, be sure to click one of the subscription options (top left) to be notified each time the blog is updated. Thank you for visiting. Tell your your positive-thinking, motivated friends and your not-so-motivated friends about the blog. There is something for everyone.

There are direct links to downloadable mp3 affirmations at The Affirmation Spot.com on the right menu. They are set to music and allow you take positive thoughts with you wherever you go all day. Enjoy today’s post.


I plan to record this and add it to the website in the near future, but decided to share the text today. If you read this to yourself, you can feel your confidence rising and your stress melting away. Why a manifesto? This self-dialogue is full of self-declarations of your readiness to move forward to healing, success, peace, or whatever your immediate goals are.candle1.jpg

The first key is to realize that you have the courage, the wisdom and the strength within you to make the changes you want to make in your life; to bring about the healing you seek. For, in truth your healing comes from within. Others may facilitate or act as mediators, but it is the healer within you that is bringing about the miracle you are receiving right now. Know this deeply.

Focus your healing energies on bringing about an end to your suffering. This healing is occurring within you right now. It is not far off in the future. Your healing is a reality right now in this moment. You are experiencing a complete healing. Your mind, body, emotions, and spirit are all benefiting. Joy is increasing and expanding in your life exponentially. Your horizons are growing brighter and brighter.

You are opening your heart and your mind to possibilities you had never before considered. Right now you are accepting that anything and everything is possible for you. You understand that the circumstances in your life are always perfect to create the highest version of yourself. Your tools, your gifts, and your talents are more than enough to create a life of abundant success and happiness. Feel the joy increasing in your life.

Feel your confidence rising. There is no situation you cannot handle. There are no limits to what you can achieve. Nothing can occur that you can’t learn from and turn to your advantage. As your joy increases and your happiness manifests; there is less room for fear in your life, less room for self-doubt. These aspects of yourself are clearly decreasing in your life.

In fact, you are, as I speak, releasing your fears, releasing your self-doubt. They serve no purpose in your life. So you are releasing them and letting them go. You are successful. You think like a success, you talk like a success, you act like a success. You are a success!  Your success is complete; encompassing all aspects of your life.

Your spiritual life is a success, your career is a success, and your relationships are a success. You are a success. And success means progress in every area of your life. You are releasing the habitual patterns of thought and action that have held you back in the past.

You are releasing thoughts and actions that limit you in any way, shape, or form. By releasing these limiting patterns in your life; you are now completely free to live your life in this moment and to create your highest good in the here and now. You are determined to be fully present in the experience of now. You are intuitive, creative, and spontaneous in creating your new life – each moment, each day.

Feel the harmony, strength, and confidence this knowing creates deep within you. You are becoming the person you always knew you could be right this moment!

Peace…

Ray

The Affirmation Spot.com

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