How often do we say it or hear others say it: “I’ve gotta do this or I’ve gotta do that.” It seems our society is obsessed with “gottas.” We stress ourselves over all the things we’ve gotta get done. What we have forgotten is that most of the things we’ve gotta do relate to choices we’ve made. Through time, we have convinced ourselves that theses gottas are necessities imposed upon us by others.
We seem to thrive on stress and worry. When one worry is resolved we seem to immediately start searching for the next thing to worry about like the addict seeking his next high. There is something within us that causes us to feel guilt if we aren’t doing SOMETHING.
Some might argue we gotta pay taxes, or conform to the law of gravity, or die. There are things that might be called the rules of life that we cannot get around. Why enslave ourselves by applying “gotta” to them? Most things we “gotta” do amount to no more than choices we’ve made related to who we are or who we think we are or who we think we’re supposed to be.
When you hear yourself saying “gotta” in any circumstance, ask the question, “Why must I do this? The “because” phrase that follows will tell who or what has conditioned you to think you “gotta” do that. “Because my mom wants me to.” “Because what would my wife think.” “Because God says so.” “Because I need it to be happy.” Your “because phrase” will also tell you what needs to be healed or let go of or faced to remove that “gotta” from your life.
If your “because” phrase is just old programming or isn’t really something you value, then you know you are dealing with a gotta that was once forced upon you from the outside, but now can be released.
Most of our gottas are really choices disguised as gottas. If so, then it really isn’t a gotta imposed by the universe, but rather value judgments we have made or allowed to be made for us.
We have power over choices whereas a true gotta is dictated to us. Thinking about things this way is very freeing. Realizing that most our gottas really aren’t and taking responsibility for making the choices we want in our life is the first step towards getting out of The Gotta Zone.
Wishing you a peaceful and positive Monday….